Sexuality, Pt 4: God's Design

Part I // Part II // Part III // Part V
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Every design can be broken down to its most essential components, based on their functionality.  There is nothing in the natural world that exists without function, even though we might not necessarily be able to identify all the particulars.  Heck, even Target wall art and useless yard-sale nicknacks both serve purposes (albeit not ones that I will tolerate in my house).  Whether we're talking about atoms or appendages, and whether you look at the universe through the lens of creationism or evolutionary theory, it is undeniable that there is functionality in the material world.

The water cycle.  The food chain.  Oxygen.  The sun.

All of these serve a purpose.  All of them are co-dependent in the natural system.  Were one piece to become misaligned, the entire Rube Goldberg would come to a screeching halt.

And speaking of sex...

Maybe it sounds cold, simplified, or ultra-conservative, but human sexuality is also ultimately defined by its functionality, not unlike these other elements of the material world.  Maybe you like to think of sex as a cathartic, spiritual, or social tool, and the biblical mandate sounds restrictive and limiting to your sexual freedom.  Maybe you think that God doesn't care about sexuality.  Maybe you just don't want Him to know what goes on in your bedroom.

Regardless of what we might be prone to think, however, the Bible records God's function and design for human sexuality.  Not unlike the universe operating on its infinitely complex system of ropes and pulleys, one kink in the strings of sexuality can bring the entire system crashing down.

In the Beginning

God originated His plan at creation, a plan that has neither altered over time nor been adapted to make provision for human preference.  You're probably already familiar with the story out of Genesis, but if we're going to discuss the rightness or wrongness of sexuality, we ultimately have to return to its origin in order to determine its purpose and functionality.

In the first chapter of the Bible, the story of creation is abbreviated.  Tim Keller wisely makes the observation that Genesis 1 and 2 together form a literary couplet, much in the same vein as Judges 4 & 5 and Exodus 14 & 15, where "one chapter describes a historical event and the other is a song or a poem about the theological meaning of the event... Genesis 1 has the earmarks of poetry and is therefore a 'song' about the wonder and meaning of God's creation... [while] Genesis 2 is an account of how it happened" (The Reason for God, p 97).  We can see the poetry infused into the very text.

26 Then God said, “Let us make man in our image, after our likeness. And let them have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over the livestock and over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.” 

27 So God created man in his own image,

in the image of God he created him;

male and female he created them. 

28 And God blessed them. And God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it, and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth.”

Then, Genesis 2 more specifically documents the mode of creation:

7 ...then the Lord God formed the man of dust from the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living creature. 8 And the Lord God planted a garden in Eden, in the east, and there he put the man whom he had formed. 9 And out of the ground the Lord God made to spring up every tree that is pleasant to the sight and good for food. The tree of life was in the midst of the garden, and the tree of the knowledge of good and evil... 15 The Lord God took the man [Adam] and put him in the garden of Eden to work it and keep it. 16 And the Lord God commanded the man, saying, “You may surely eat of every tree of the garden, 17 but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die.” 18 Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” 19 Now out of the ground the Lord God had formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would call them. And whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name. 20 The man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him. 21 So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. 22 And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. 23 Then the man said, 

“This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.”

24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. 25 And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.

So that's the account.  Now let's discuss the particular elements and their implications.

"The man and his wife" / "male and female he created them"

Not even a dog would suffice as Adam's sidekick.

There are plenty of biblical passages with easy to misunderstand subtext.  Not so here.

God designed the base unit of humanity in a pair: one man, one woman.  One male and one female.

No "helper fit for Adam" was to be found in all of the created world.  God's miraculous act of forming Eve from Adam's rib was not His Plan B or an afterthought.  Instead, the specific delay in creating Adam's helper serves as a very intentional reminder to mankind -- even in the beginning -- that man requires a very specific counterpart, and that no other piece of creation had the necessary functionality to fulfill that role.  Eve was created specifically to supplement Adam, to strengthen him, and was symbolically taken from his side as a picture of the intimate and deeply connected relationship a husband and a wife were intended to share.  He, to nurture, protect, and prefer; she, to support, embolden, and encourage.

This was God's first and only design.

"A man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife"

This is the establishment of biblical, God-honoring marriage.  Mankind has continued to utilize this lifestyle throughout history -- as much for love and companionship as for the very survival of the human race.  God gave Adam -- a man who had no earthly parents himself -- the instructions to pass down to his future sons: leave your father and mother (in modern terms, become financially independent of them) and become emotionally, physically, and spiritually joined to your wife, for the rest of your life on earth.

Modern society doesn't place nearly as much emphasis on marriage as did older cultures.  Today, it's widely considered more of a novelty than a practicality.  It's treated as a romantic pastime for people who are in love, which is why the marriage can be so carelessly discarded when it grows old or complicated.

"A much wiser and more mature view of the world," this generation argues, "supports cohabitation and committed relationships.  Marriage as an institution has failed."

Of course, the reality is not that marriage as an institution has failed, but that we as human beings have failed.  With the entrance of sin into the world came individuals and even whole societies that have disregarded and even perverted marriage, the core human relationship, extracting the one quality they found attractive and warping it into something that existed only for the gratification of their lusts.  This type of sexual brokenness was one of the first consequences of the break in fellowship between God and man, and continues to be among the most debilitating and self-destructive human behaviors.  Without marital parameters consecrating sex as a sacred act -- something to be protected and valued by a husband and wife -- the leap to things like homosexuality, bestiality, and rape becomes remarkably short.

However, the fact that deviant sexual behavior has existed in one form or another since the fall of man does not mean that its longevity is evidence of its legitimacy.  Sin's very existence is not proof of its acceptability.  Perhaps our society doesn't consider itself wicked for its wanton sexual escapades, nor for its stunning divorce rate, but the all-knowing God of the universe certainly doesn't lose track.  He is a just God who absolutely does not desire to condemn anyone (2 Pet 3.9); yet for those who refuse to acknowledge His absolute truth, there can only be one, final fate.

Marriage, the holy union of one man and one woman, is the order God established in the beginning.  Its sanctity is just as important today as it was then.  It is not an archaic practice or an empty commitment, and in itself is not a broken institution: to the contrary, its parameters are broken only by the ones who practice it halfheartedly.

"They were not ashamed"

Prior to sin entering the world, Adam and Eve's sexual relationship was perfect.  Their intimacy was characterized by joy, beauty, and innocence.  There was no shame to mar the perfection.  Neither wondered what sex with someone else would be like, nor was there any emotional baggage from previous relationships to cloud their marriage.  There was no fear that the ways in which they were physically engaging were wrong.

Whether our culture wants to admit it or not, sexuality makes an emotional mess of us all.  All intimate acts that do not take place in the confines of a loving, committed marriage ultimately bring only regret.  Maybe not in the moment, but certainly when it's over.  Maybe you regret that it's gone, or maybe you regret that you ever engaged sexually with that person.  Maybe you don't know what you feel, or maybe the shame disguises itself as a type of nostalgia for a past relationship that once meant so much.  But no matter the form it takes, this lack of fulfillment is all part of the same thing.

Adam and Eve knew perfect sexuality, one that was untainted by sin.  That was God's design -- for sex to be a beautiful, enjoyable, and fulfilling expression of mutual love and commitment shared between a husband and a wife.  However, both they and we chose the alternative: the allure of sin, which promises something better, but leads only to all manner of brokenness.

Guilt and shame come with the package of practicing sexuality outside of marriage -- as rightly they should.  And yet, when we begin to acknowledge the wrong that we've done, we find that God offers a forgiveness like no other -- a perfect, once-and-for-all redemption that, while not necessarily eliminating the consequences of our sin, does remove from us the judgment we have earned.

God delights to show mercy to all who come in true repentance.

"Be fruitful and multiply"

Let's be frank.  Sex between a husband and wife is not only for producing children.  Marital intimacy serves many purposes, not the least of which is simple enjoyment shared between husband and wife.  It is an expression of mutual dependence and affection, a beautifully unifying experience, and an emotional type of glue.

However, sex is also the vehicle of human reproduction.  That's Health 101, right?  Simplistic though it may be, it's still worth mentioning because the push for homosexual "rights" is essentially a denial of the importance of continuing the species.

"Don't be ridiculous," some would say.  "That's taking it too far."

Well, at its root, homosexuality claims, "I want sex only the way I want it."  And from a purely physiological standpoint, same-sex intimacy cannot produce offspring.  Sure, same-sex couples can adopt, or they can utilize modern medicine and surrogate mothers or sperm donors to crudely construct a family for themselves.  However, because that type of devised parenthood does not occur naturally, and because that is not the way God intended for the family to be structured, it is a strong indicator that the practice of homosexuality not only lacks functionality but also goes completely against the system's design.

"You did NOT just make that joke."

Again, sex is not only for making babies.  Not every couple will want children, and not every couple will be able to have children.  God's directive to Adam and Eve was much more purposeful because they were the only human beings on the planet at that point in history.  However, just because the earth is fully populated in the modern era, and just because we've got what we think are new and updated ideas about sex, doesn't mean that God's design should be forgone.

That would be *ahem* to throw out the baby with the bathwater.

~*~

Maybe it seems like I've shifted gears a little bit, but in the modern era, any discussion of God's design for sex will inevitably lead to the issue of homosexuality.  Pardon my bluntness, but there really isn't any room for argument on the matter when it comes to having an accurate biblical perspective.  Just as the pursuit of intimate heterosexual relationships outside of marriage is sinful, so also is the practice of homosexuality.

I feel that a caveat is necessary here.

Please understand, my goal with the remainder of this post is not to attack homosexuality, to lambast those who practice or sympathize with it, or to add to the argumentative noise of the internet.  However, the truth of the Bible is absolute, and it will offend people when it rubs up against their divergent choices.  Jesus told the masses that He didn't come to bring peace, but a sword (Matt 10.34) -- not because He desired to infuriate the world, but because they would inevitably be infuriated by His personal challenge to their sinful lifestyles.  With this post, I don't in any way intend to be militant, aggressive, or angry.  I'm a sinner in need of grace, just like every other person in this world.  It has been my goal throughout writing this series to accurately portray biblical sexuality and share truth in a constructive and understanding way -- not to hurl accusations or to elevate my personal opinion to the same level as the Word of God.

Bearing that in mind, remember -- as I stated in part two of this series -- that the contemporary push for marriage equality is not just a harmless desire for the right to personal sexual expression.  Maybe on the surface the gay agenda is just an innocent quest for individuality, but its pursuit to achieve a new label -- a label handed down by the legal system that not only legitimizes but also promotes their lifestyle -- is an attempt to crack the shell of God's moral law.

That makes it not just an issue of sex.  It's a rejection of absolute truth.

The homosexual community doesn't like that aspect of biblical rationality.  They don't like moral absolutes or one-way-to-heaven theology because they want to dissect the Word and enable one tiny violation.  Just one can't be damning, can it?  However, as the Bible attests, the way to enter heaven is through the narrow gate (Matt 7.13).  Just as the rich man must leave his wealth behind, because he can't carry it into heaven with him, so also the man who makes his identity his sexual preference must shed his lustful activities, because his gratification profits nothing in the light of eternity.

Maybe that sounds unfair.  "I was born this way," the homosexual man would say, "I can't help it."

The truth is, we are all born in sin.  We were all born "this way."

Contrary to what many conservative Christians might think, the Bible actually supports the modern hypothesis of genetic predisposition, because it teaches me that I am born into sin (Psa 51.5) -- both spiritually and physically (in other words, genetically).  So yes, homosexual tendency probably does find its root in a malformed gene or hormone imbalance -- not unlike every other sin humans have tendencies to commit.  Yet even still, that doesn't excuse me from my own culpability.  In other words, genetics are no more an excuse for the way I am than a difficult home life is.  I'm still every bit responsible for the sins I commit, whether I point the finger at my genetic makeup or my family.

Even as a believer, sexual sin was a struggle for me all my dating life, and it was hard to stop.  However, just because it was hard to overcome the temptation doesn't mean I had the right to claim I was born that way and continue.  Just because it was my flesh's inclination to pursue sex doesn't mean I was morally excused to float in my carnality instead of swimming upstream.  Therefore, even if my genes do predetermine my propensity to sin in a sexual manner, that doesn't mean I have a get-out-of-jail-free card.  In the same way, the man whose genes predetermine his addictive behavior doesn't have the liberty to abuse alcohol and live his life in a drunken, angry stupor.

Whatever our struggle, we're still held to the same standard of holiness as is the rest of the human race.  We either meet that standard through the person of Jesus Christ or we fall short of it.  The beauty of the Scriptures is that He enables me to lay aside my predisposition to sin -- an enslavement to which I'd be completely broken without Him.  The blood of Christ enables me to rise above my inherent genetic weaknesses and become a new creation in Him.  If we refuse to acknowledge this fact, then sure -- we truly can't help ourselves.  We remain slaves to our sin, dead in our trespasses, and willfully ignorant of salvation.  But if we genuinely desire to know God and to pursue lives with meaning, then we will be willing to look past our weaknesses and accept His divine help to overcome them.

Frankly, the "this is just the way I am" argument seems so defeatist to me.  "I can't help it," this perspective claims, ultimately (if unintentionally) implying that homosexuality is nothing more than a genetic weakness, and one that cannot be overcome.

Who wants to live a life where all that I am and can be is predetermined by a genetic factor?

Who wants to live a life where I can't help who I am, so I'll not even try to change?

Wouldn't a more invigorating existence be to rise above what we are?  By the way, Christ enables us to do that.

Keep in mind, though, that our desire for sinful things isn't an indication that our wants are "natural" -- only that our hearts, as John Calvin astutely proclaimed, are wicked idol factories.  We wrongfully think that things besides a loving God and His basic laws will satisfy our cravings, and make idols out of them.  We deceive ourselves into thinking that what we want is our right, that what we want is perfectly acceptable, and that no one has the right to tell us it's wrong.  Anything we place in greater prominence to God and His law becomes an idol -- anything we choose to worship instead of Him.  Whether that's sex or money or something else entirely, it is the very definition of sin.

That being said, has homosexuality become the "cardinal sin" of our decade?  Unfortunately, yes.

All sins are equal in God's eyes.  Being guilty of one is to be guilty of them all (Jas 2.10), and homosexuality is no different.

However, if the gay community feel especially targeted by the church, it is because they are the only group in recent history that has so radically attempted to justify its sinfulness via legality.  Their pursuit of total political, social, and religious validation of their lifestyle is an attempt to eliminate their own spiritual culpability.  What they perceive as a type of civil oppression is millennia of cultural rejection coming to a head.  As previously stated, perversions of sexuality have existed since the fall of man, and while countless individuals have engaged in them, these types of sex acts have always been regarded by the larger community as deviations from the natural order and ostracized.  Only in this modern era, the age of moral relativism, has the drive for recognition made the practice of homosexuality a culture of its own.

In fact, the current generation views the homosexual agenda as a matter on par with the Civil Rights movement of the 1960s.  From that long-in-coming social upheaval, the world finally recognized that the color of a man's skin shouldn't determine his status or rank him according to old-world notions of racial hierarchy.  Similarly, the homosexual community argues, the rest of the world should finally pull its head out of its keister and recognize their right to every civic privilege that heterosexual people enjoy.

Frankly, I find it insulting that the homosexual community liken their struggle for recognition to African Americans' life-or-death battle for equal rights -- and I'm not even black.  The Civil Rights movement wasn't about legalizing a sinful practice, it was about abolishing one.  Furthermore, a man doesn't have the choice to not be black or to not be white, though either can certainly embrace their racial identity as something God has specifically designed.  However, a man does have the choice whether he will pursue the biblical notion of sexuality or a worldly one -- regardless of what temptations he might experience.  What the Civil Rights movement ultimately taught the world was that the color of a man's skin doesn't make him a sinner.  What the Bible teaches, on the other hand, is that being a human does, and that no matter what justifying labels we slap on our sinful behaviors, they are still condemning.

Though they might cry victim and insist that they have done nothing morally wrong, the homosexual rights crusade doesn't have the same footing to stand upon as did the Civil Rights movement.  We can look again at the Genesis account where God created Adam and Eve specifically male and female, with the intent to harmonically and cooperatively fill social and spiritual roles.  We can look at the modern-day pharisees' favorite passage in Romans 1, where Paul explicitly states that homosexuality is an abomination and an abandonment of the "natural affections" God intended.  No matter which way you slice it, if you claim to have an accurate, biblical understanding of sexual immorality, then you must recognize homosexuality as simply another aspect of the broken nature of this world -- not unlike the racism against which Martin Luther King Jr. fought, a cause for which he would ultimately give his life, in order to see it finally abolished.

This type of hatred is the result of a malformed understanding

of grace, and is every bit as despicable to God as the practice
these individuals are condemning.

Now, have the methods of opposing marriage equality employed by the church been fair, respectful, and pleasing to God?

Certainly not all of them.

Certainly not all of them.

Though the core principle that homosexuality is a sin is 100% biblical, Christendom's manner of conveying that truth has often been equally as sinful.  I am deeply distressed by the church at large's stance toward homosexuality, and moved for a community of individuals who desperately need to hear the love, forgiveness, and regeneration of Christ proclaimed -- not just His judgment.  As bearers of the truth of God, we have a tremendous responsibility to communicate in love that life-changing knowledge to the gay population.  Such a message of grace is most palatable when it is presented to sinners by sinners.  Let's never forget that we're imperfect also, restored to favor with God only by the blood of Jesus Christ -- which we did not deserve -- and that the truth we bear is not our own.

Problems Inherent to Homosexuality

Homosexuality is not a functional application of sex.  It is a misuse of God's design for human intimacy.  It ignores His intent for family structure and denies the opportunity and privilege of natural procreation.  Furthermore, it is fraught with philosophical and logistical problems, separate entirely from the fact that human anatomy itself is not conducive to the homosexual act.

For starters, homosexuality can't be considered evolutionary.  In addition to going against the Bible, it also contradicts Darwinism.  You might be of the impression that afore-mentioned scientific developments are evolution in motion -- that our new ability to perform sex change operations and grow organs and babies in petri dishes is the process of our species evolving into a superior form, and that homosexuality is just one result of nature's inevitable course.  However, the undergirding principle of evolutionary theory is natural selection, or the survival of the fittest -- the preservation of the essential (the functional) in order to develop into the superior.  Without natural reproduction, the theoretical evolutionary process breaks down entirely.

Homosexuality is therefore not evolutionary.  It's devolutionary.

Another problem inherent to homosexuality is that its practice weakens potential same-sex friendships.  For the same reason it is difficult (I would argue near impossible) for a man to be close friends with a woman without creating romantic attachment, it is difficult for gay men or women to have any type of mutually encouraging, spiritually uplifting relationship that isn't at least vaguely tainted by sexual tension.  The Bible prescribes discipleship-based relationships between members of the same gender for the sake of encouraging one another in godly living.   It's why there are men's Bible studies and women's Bible studies: to specifically tackle struggles and challenges inherent to gender -- many of which involve relationships with the opposite gender.  That endeavor would be completely undermined by romantic connection.  Therefore, SSA throws a wrench into the whole concept.

Homosexuality is also problematic to our modern culture because, through its aggressive push for legal recognition, it has opened the door for other deviant sexual behaviors to achieve the same type of legitimization.  For example, though pedophilia is still considered a psychiatric disorder, it has more recently been described as a "disorder of sexual preference, phenomenologically similar to a heterosexual or homosexual sexual orientation because it emerges before or during puberty, and because it is stable over time" (Brian L. Cutler, Encyclopedia of Psychology and Law).  Still illegal, perhaps, but now labeled as something slightly less harmful -- something slightly more sympathetic.  The fact that something like homosexuality -- something once universally considered a deviant sexual behavior -- is now vying for recognition as a legitimate practice means that other deviant sexual behaviors are equally in the running for that type of recognition.

Maybe that seems unfair.  I'm certainly not saying homosexuality is the same thing as pedophilia.  However, I don't think their conjunction in this regard is an illogical stretch.  If both homosexuality and pedophilia are violations of God's design for sex, then the legitimization of one is the opportunity for the other.

Jesus requires His followers to do hard things

You've probably been told by the internet, the TV, and even wayward pastors alike that you can be a vibrant part of the church, love God, and still keep your homosexual lifestyle.  You've probably been told that God loves you as you are and that Biblical judgment of sexual sins is for those who don't love God, or for those who are unfaithful to their sexual partners.

This all sounds fantastic to a world that desires no absolute truth: live your life how you want, with a flexible moral code that feels like complete absolution, under the twinkling eye of a "favorite uncle" type of god who allows you to be your own person and make your messes, but still slips you candy at the dinner table.  That notion of "god" makes Him out to be a spineless entity with no real power to help -- a god completely undeserving of our time, dependance, or adoration.

On the other hand, a God who controls the universe, who sustains life and exists beyond full human comprehension, who insists on His absolute law and His absolute glory because He is the rightful, supreme being, yet who made a way for us to have an intimate relationship with Him by sacrificing His Son on our behalf...

That's a God worth believing in.  That is the God of the Bible.

Make no mistake about this: if you are in a homosexual relationship, neither your life nor your actions can be pleasing to that type of God.  That's not because your sin is worse than any others.  The same standard applies to anyone who lies, steals, or sins sexually with members of the opposite sex.  We can't claim to love God and yet continue in sin.  Mistakes are one thing; habitual, lifestyle-based sinning is another.  The God of the Bible requires righteousness of His followers: in order to follow Him, we must take up a cross and walk in His footsteps.  Grace is free to all, but costly to those who choose it.  In order to become like Christ, we must give up our notions about how life should be, the sinful desires that we want to pursue, and our selfish philosophies about what we deserve.

God absolutely does accept you just as you are, weaknesses, failures, and all.  But He is not content to leave you that way.

You might say, "You've never struggled with same-sex attraction, so this is all easy for you to say."  And you'd be right.  However, I have my own temptations to overcome -- temptations that have been difficult to let go of, sins that have felt like "no big deal" and "my right" to take.  It's hard to overcome personal weakness.  It's especially hard to overcome sexual sin.  However, with the strength God supplies, it is not only possible, but also truly fulfilling to find our satisfaction ultimately in Him and Him alone.

We can't follow Him if we insist on keeping our pet sins with us.  Heterosexual or homosexual, we need to recognize that God requires obedience from His followers -- not because that's what saves us, but because that obedience is the evidence that He has saved us.  To lay down our sinful desires is to demonstrate that our true desire is -- above all else -- to love and to glorify Him with our lifestyles.

Yes, it's hard.  But it's functional.  And He is fulfilling.  This is what we were beautifully designed to do.

Ephesians 3.20: Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, 21 to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.